Manchester City will play Stoke in the FA Cup final after they beat Manchester United and Bolton respectively at Wembley this weekend. It will be City’s first FA Cup final in 30 years and Stoke’s first ever.

City saw off rivals United 1-0 on Saturday thanks to Yaya Toure’s 52nd-minute winner and Stoke thrashed Bolton 5-0 on Sunday with goals from Matthew Etherington, Robert Huth and Kenwyne Jones in the first 30 minutes and two second-half strikes by Jon Walters.

In the Premier League Arsenal missed the chance to close the gap on United to four points as Liverpool held them to a 1-1 draw at the Emirates. Following a second-half injury to Jamie Carragher, Robin van Persie put Arsenal ahead with a 98th-minute penalty but Dirk Kuyt equalised from the spot in the 102nd. Chelsea are only two points behind Arsenal after they won 3-1 at West Brom.

Blackpool replaced Wigan in the bottom three due to a 3-1 home defeat. West Ham are a point behind Blackpool following a 2-1 loss at home to Aston Villa. Blackburn are only two points above the drop zone after a 2-0 defeat at Everton and both Birmingham and Sunderland five clear thanks to the Blues’ 2-0 win.

Lewis Hamilton won the Chinese Grand Prix, the Englishman’s first victory of the season. Hamilton overtook world champion and championship leader Sebastien Vettel, who took the first two races of the year, with four laps to go. Mark Webber denied Jenson Button third place by overtaking him on the penultimate lap.

Leicester remain top of Rugby Union’s Premiership despite being held 41-41 at home to Gloucester, who equalised with a last-minute interception try from Eliota Fuimaono-Sapulo. Saracens are just two points behind the Tigers in second and nine clear of third-placed Gloucester with their seventh straight Premiership win – 33-12 at Exeter. Northampton occupy the last play-off spot courtesy of a 22-15 win at Newcastle, who climbed off bottom thanks to a losing bonus point. They were replaced by Leeds, who were thrashed 51-18 at Wasps. Elsewhere, London Irish and Bath strengthened their grasp on European Cup qualification with wins at Sale and at home to Harlequins respectively.

Huddersfield moved top of Rugby League’s Super League with a 38-6 win at Leeds while Castleford, who led last week, drew 26-26 at Harlequins. St Helens are second thanks to a 52-6 thrashing of Wakefield. Warrington are fourth courtesy of a 64-6 demolition of Crusaders and Wigan, who won 28-16 at Hull KR, are fifth. Catalan Dragons are next after a 28-10 win at home to Hull FC and Salford thumped Bradford 56-16.

In Cricket’s County Championship Warwickshire stunned Division One title favourites Somerset by an innings and 382 runs, defending champions Nottinghamshire beat Hampshire by nine wickets and Durham saw off Yorkshire by 146 runs. In Division Two Derbyshire and Northamptonshire enjoyed innings wins over Leicestershire and Kent respectively while Glamorgan beat Gloucestershire and Middlesex defeated Kent.

Finally, Emmanuel Mutai and Mary Keitany secured a Kenyan double in the London Marathon men’s and women’s races.

A crept slowly towards my balcony overlooking the car park where the gang loitered. “I can see you” I whispered, like a cross between James Bond and Fireman Sam. They had been hanging around Ady’s BMW and my slightly older Fiat Punto for days but this time I wasn’t going anywhere. My eyes were fixed on this army of tracksuits.

I pondered on their intentions. Maybe they were eying up potential cars with a five-finger discount. Perhaps they preferred to leave their mark on the side of vehicles with a set of house keys. Or maybe they particularly liked standing in the middle of a private car park watched by yours truly: Eagle Eyes Willmott.

One of the gang members walked away from the group and stood beside my car. I had my iPhone ready to call the authorities like any good journalist would. “I’ve got you now fella” I muttered under my breath. And what happened next was truly incredible. As soon as the estranged gang member turned his back, the others scarpered down the alleyway…they were playing a game of hide & seek.

I watched for five minutes as the lad scurried around the wheely bins and nearby trees in an attempt to find his mates. Of course I could see where they were all hiding, which made it far more exciting for me.

Is it wrong to fear for the welfare of a Fiat Punto I call Stan? Probably not, but I’m sure it’s not healthy. I guess my hope is to become a bit more optimistic when viewing those around me as I get older.

Ephesians 4:31-32

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

South Africa’s Charl Schwartzel profited from Rory McIlroy’s nightmare last round to win the 75th Masters.

Twenty-one-year-old McIlroy, from Northern Ireland, led by four shots going into the final round at Augusta but carded 80 to finish four under par.

Schwartzel, by contrast, saved his best until last in firing 66 – including birdies at the last four holes – to end on 14 under. His nearest challengers were Australian duo Jason Day and Adam Scott two shots back.

Manchester United remained on course for the Premier League title with a 2-0 victory at home to Fulham, although nearest challengers Arsenal and Chelsea also won. The Gunners were 3-1 victors at Blackpool and the Blues saw off bottom side Wigan 1-0 at Stamford Bridge.

Wigan’s defeat was cushioned by the other sides in the bottom three losing. West Ham were beaten 3-0 at Bolton and Wolves lost by the same score at home to Everton.

Elsewhere, Tottenham kept their top four hopes alive with a 3-2 win at home to Stoke, Aston Villa eased their relegation fears by beating Newcastle 1-0 at Villa Park and West Brom did likewise with a 3-2 victory at Sunderland. Blackburn and Birmingham drew 1-1 at Ewood Park.

Northampton are the only English side left in Rugby Union’s European Cup after Leicester were knocked out in this weekend’s quarter-finals. The Tigers lost 17-10 to Leinster in Dublin but the Saints, who will play Perpignan in the semi-finals, beat Ulster 23-13 at Milton Keynes. Leinster face Toulouse in the other semi.

Leeds enhanced their Premiership survival hopes with a dramatic 30-29 win at Newcastle, who replace them at the bottom of the table although the Falcons have a game in hand. Leeds’ victory was secured by fly-half Adrian Jarvis’ last-minute drop-goal. Sale look safe after a 36-31 win at home to Gloucester. Elsewhere, Bath beat Exeter 26-18.

Castleford went top of Rugby League’s Super League with 52-20 win at home to Salford. They lead on points difference from Huddersfield, who beat Warrington 29-10. Third-placed St Helens won 34-18 at Crusaders.

Elsewhere, Catalan Dragons shocked champions Wigan 47-28 and there were wins for Hull FC over Bradford, Hull KR over Leeds and Wakefield over Harlequins.

The County Championship Cricket season began with Division One Yorkshire the first team to secure a win – by nine wickets at newly-promoted Worcestershire.

Defending champion Sebastian Vettel extended his Formula One championship lead to 24 points with victory in the Malaysian Grand Prix. Jenson Button was second and Nick Heidfeld third.

Finally, 14-1 shot Ballabriggs – trained by Donald McCain and ridden by Jason Maguire – won the Grand National at Aintree.

Incredible. Out of all the apartments in the town, God chose to move into my block. I remember it so vividly, the moment I learned the almighty had moved in. I parked my trusted Punto in my designated space and clocked a brand new BMW a few places down. Though in the Bible God models true humility, it seems things have changed for the creator. The car’s number plate proudly read: Ade is God. Hallelujah. Its finally happened I thought.

I fell to my knees majestically in the car park, awe-struck. I chose not to dwell on the fact that God had revealed his new nickname, and also chose to spend £79,999 on a vehicle when some of his neighbours struggled to come to terms with devastating redundancies…after all, God can do what he likes. Hallelujah.

Some of the residents watched bewildered as I bowed continuously to the Lord’s chosen chariot. I felt sorry for them. How they would rue the day when they refused to bow before their God. I knelt for hours until it happened. The moment I’ve been anticipating my whole Christian life. I was approached by the Lord. He stood at just 5ft 6″ tall, and wore torn G-Star jeans and a t-shirt which had pictures of women on the front. Hallelujah, God cares about fashion…and women.

He looked at me as I bowed before him. And then he actually spoke. I broke down in tears as his voice engaged with my sinful being. “What are you doing mate?!” He asked me powerfully. I assumed the reason he called me “mate” was because I’d accepted the atonement of Christ which makes me a friend of God, saved by Grace, through faith so none can boast.

I mumbled an answer repeating the words Lord, saviour, forgive me, thank you. He opened his boot and reached for his robe, which was disguised as a brown River Island leather jacket. I waited for the moment where I’d have to give an account for my faith. But it never came. In fact none of the things listed in Revelations took place. I looked through my tears for the unattainable number of people groups singing in different tongues the songs of praise and worship for their saviour. I listened intently for the music of the heavenly realms and prepared myself for a glimpse of the new creation. But nothing happened. I slowly dried my eyes as BMW Ade stood over me and told me I was embarrassing him using some uncouth language and a violent gesture. “I thought you were God” I mumbled.

Turns out he’s not the messiah, he’s a very naughty boy.

Peace.

In the company of my fellow Morrison’s shoppers, I stood appalled at the scene which played out in front of me. A mother had left her newborn in a trolley-seat near the tills as she tootled off looking for shampoo. The baby was left alone to cry for around five minutes before a member of staff paid it some attention.

We scanned the store from our standing positions as the growing concern became as thick as the two for one milkshakes on offer near the checkouts. I broke the silence after a short while: “Has anyone got any idea who the mother is?”

Heads starting shaking around me. The store manager was approaching the tanoid system, before a young woman arrived startled at all the fuss. The elderly Morrison’s worker handed the baby back to the mum calmly. She encouraged the mother to “Try to be more careful”.

I walked out of the store quickly, resisting the temptation to sarcastically explain why mothers shouldn’t abandon their newborn babies in a crowded supermarket.

As I took my trolley back to the designated bay, I thought of how much better I’d be as a parent. I pondered on how I would take extra care of those things which mattered most. A judgemental smile soon grew across my face on my approach to my well-parked Fiat Punto.

The problem was that I’d lost my car keys. As I prayed that God would help me find them, I remembered my previous thoughts.

(How could I say I’d be a better parent if I can’t even look after my own car?)

Thankfully, someone had handed in my keys to an elderly Morrison’s worker who had been previously tied up handling another situation. As she handed me my shame, she encouraged me to “Try to be more careful”.

I’ve been reading Matthew 25 this week: “After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them. The man who had received five bags of gold brought the other five. ‘Master,’ he said, ‘you entrusted me with five bags of gold. See, I have gained five more.’

“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’

Alex – the forgiven hypocrite.

A Christian and a Muslim were walking down the road.

Sounds like the start of a bad joke doesn’t it? In fact, this was last Sunday. My newly met Muslim friend genuinely wanted to know whether she would be “allowed” to come to church with me.

I’d not really noticed the headscarf. Looking back, I suppose it was a bit of an odd picture; my gentle and quiet guest in her black hijab, discussing the book of Philippians with the talkative blonde student who thinks she’s a surfer and wears a bright purple bobble hat. It’s not the norm in church culture is it? My friend even flagged it up again at the end of the service: “Are you sure people won’t be offended by me being here? You don’t think they’ll mind that I can’t sing all the songs? Do you think they have a problem with me wearing this?”

In our Western culture of surface-deep philosophy, where the packaging is everything and appearance dictates our snap-judgement first-impressions, it’s no wonder my friend was acutely aware of being written-off for her religious garb that shouted “something different!”

And it only struck me then how it isn’t ok for me as a follower of Jesus not to walk with people from other faiths into Church. I don’t remember Jesus telling me to only invite certain types of people to His party.

In 1 Corinthians 9: 18- 20, Paul has this take on living out our faith:

“Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law.”

If my friend and her hijab don’t feel welcomed and accepted by God’s representatives on earth, then I think I’ve missed the point. If us women don’t sacrifice our own reputations, and change our focus away from each other’s appearances, we might as well go sit in Starbucks on a Sunday and people-watch out the windows.

A Christian and a Muslim were walking down the road. The Muslim turned to the Christian and said… “I’ll see you next Sunday for church.”

I see the rush of the city engulf my friends in suit jackets and nice shoes. I watch crowds of people fill stadiums with songs as hotdog stands sell out at half time. Life’s awkward scenarios slow my closest friends down and sideline my loved ones. Moments of immense achievement bring celebration as academia, job promotion and sporting excellence is found. Some churches flourish in these testing times as various congregations stop meeting together in parishes once vibrant, but now a distant memory.

The vastness of the universe which surrounds mankind grows ever distant as sunsets never fail to blow my mind. Children are born around me. Friends get married at the alter to exchange vows in front of crowds littered with recently divorced couples.

My own fears wake me up in the early hours as I dream of war, natural disaster, grief and mistakes I’ve not yet made. Cars fly passed me on the M1 reminding me of the frailty of life.

And as the things of my existence overwhelm me, I concede that God’s plan for this world is above and beyond my understanding. My calling is far simpler than the complexities of being human in the 21st Century.

99.9% of everything is bigger than me. I am half a grain of sand at the bottom of the seabed. My understanding of the ocean around me is a secondary issue.

And so with a sense of elation I read Ecclesiastes 2: 24-25

A person can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in their own toil. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment?

And amen to that.

“If you think you’re going to pass out Mr Willmott, try and let me know first” the young lady said, as I wept into the bed. Never has one man been reduced to so little during a back wax session.

As the beauty therapist inflicted what can only be described as prisoner of war torture on skin which previously surrounded my spine, I could only blame myself. (For who is more foolish, the fool, or the fool who follows him?)

For any women reading this, let me give you license to stop waxing. And if this annoys your fella, please tell him to get in touch with me. In my life I have broken my ribs, feet, fingers and split my head open twice, but I would gladly endure them all at once than step back into that beauty salon. Oh if I could only revisit the moment when the idea was dropped into my mind.

My CVM colleague Jonathan Sherwin AKA Dead Man Walking, had his back waxed prior to a trip to the beach with his girlfriend whom he wanted to impress. Some men scoff at such antics, however, I found it utterly romantic. And alas, this weekend I am going to a spa hotel with my lovely girlfriend who will see me in just a pair of shorts for the first time. Mr Sherwin told me back waxing doesn’t hurt at all. He said: “In fact mate, its quite relaxing when they pour hot wax on you”.

Within half a second of the first layer of DNA being torn from my virgin skin, I envisaged feeding Jonathan Sherwin to a pack of wild dogs wearing Welsh rugby shirts. The pain wrapped around me like a scene from Reservoir Dogs. How could such a quiet young woman be guilty of crimes against humanity?

As I lay there mourning each layer of skin, hair and pride which was quickly being ripped away, I was reminded of the first rule of journalism: Never Assume. I had taken a mate at his word and had paid the consequence with my own blood. I should have researched. I should have asked around. I should have left town.

I vowed only to take God at his word as I limped out of the Chesterfield house of beauty and torture. And if any word is worth digesting at first sight, its this one.

Matthew 6:19-22

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

“The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.”

Peace.

As the complaints board for BBC Radio one picked up the phone, I immediately had second thoughts. I had never filed an official complaint to the BBC in my life. I’m usually to lazy to take my complaints anywhere. The moment I’m offended I usually spit out some tasteless words before my mind wanders to the trusted Blackburn Rovers history or anything Welsh.

However, as I drove through the ancient city of York in Stan my Fiat Punto, enjoying BBC Radio one, something inside me changed. It was just before midnight on Wednesday night and DJ Nick Grimshaw was talking about lent. Now to be honest, I’d be the first to admit that so  many seemingly “Christian” festivals have become cannon fodder for commercialism. And when a journalist takes a pop at Christmas or Easter I usually shake my head, sigh a little and talk about the signs of the times. But Mr Grimshaw sparked something in me I haven’t felt for a long time.

As he talked about his failed efforts in giving up unhealthy food, he said: “It doesn’t matter, I’ll start lent again tomorrow, don’t let Jesus decide.”

Now in itself that isn’t offensive at all. In fact some people may argue the sentence wasn’t defamatory in the slightest. But my complaint to the BBC was two-fold.

1) I was offended by the way Mr Grimshaw discarded the person of Jesus as a non-entity.

2) If the same remark had been made about the frontman of any other faith, there would have been huge consequences for the gifted radio DJ.

Though in the bigger picture of our lives, my complaint is about as important as my empty bottle of olive oil. But I think in my heart, I’ve drawn a line for the future. As long as I have access to my phone, my email and my voice, I’m not going to stay quiet when I hear broadcasters who have access to millions of people, talk trash about the most important thing in my life. Because when I do stay quiet, I become a hypocrite.

Have a good weekend fellas.

Alex.

Praying for Japan and the Pacific Islands.

Dirk Kuyt’s hat-trick denied Manchester United the opportunity to go six points clear at the top of the Premier League.

Kuyt’s goals all came from close range in a 3-1 Liverpool win at Anfield a day after second-placed Arsenal, who still have a game in hand over United, were held to a goaless draw by Sunderland at the Emirates.

Manchester City kept up the pressure on the top two thanks to a 1-0 win over bottom side Wigan at the City of Manchester Stadium and Tottenham saw their Champions League qualification prospects suffer as they were held to a 3-3 draw at Wolves.

Birmingham, who won the Carling Cup last weekend, slipped into the bottom three with a 3-1 defeat at home to West Brom, combined with West Ham’s 3-0 demolition of Stoke.

Elsewhere Bolton and Fulham enjoyed 3-2 home victories against Aston Villa and Blackburn respectively and Everton won 2-1 at Newcastle.

England got their Cricket World Cup campaign back on track with a thrilling six-run win over South Africa in low-scoring contest Chennai.

Andrew Strauss’ side could only muster 171 all out but chipped away at the Proteas and Stuart Broad’s four wickets proved decisive.

England had surprisingly lost their previous Group B match to Ireland, who suffered a five-wicket defeat to co-hosts India in Bangalore on Sunday.

Saturday’s Group A encounter between Sri Lanka and Australia in Colombo – a repeat of the 2007 final – was washed out.

Castleford went top of Super League on points difference with a 27-14 win at home to Hull KR. Huddersfield, who won at Harlequins, and Warrington, who beat Leeds, also have six points – as do Quins.

Elsewhere, defending champions Wigan won at Salford, Bradford beat Wakefield, St Helens defeated Catalan Dragons and Hull FC saw off Crusaders.

Saracens moved two points behind Premiership leaders Leicester with a 15-14 win over the Tigers at Welford Road and Gloucester consolidated third by seeing off fourth-placed Bath 34-22 at Kingsholm.

Elsewhere Northampton lost to Exeter, Wasps beat Sale, Newcastle saw off Harlequins and Leeds won only their second game of the season – versus London Irish.

This weekend sees the penultimate round of Six Nations games with Italy facing France in Rome and Ireland meeting Wales in Cardiff on Saturday. England will seek to take another step towards the Grand Slam when they host Scotland on Sunday.